This morning I woke with a heavy sense of how much I neglect to do exactly what I tell everyone else to do; place their trust in God. Everyone in the house can feel it, there’s no joy in my dealings with them, and I’m sure I don’t inspire them toward the goal. I knew I needed to spend some solid time alone, praying to my Father and listening to the truth.

This is what I read in Colossians: Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory. Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature…

I also dug out Fran’s copy of “When I don’t Desire God – How to Fight for Joy” by John Piper, which I intend to read over the next couple of days.

In Matt 27 Christ’s cry from the cross was “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” When read that alongside Isaiah 53 I became really aware that my neglect, self focus, greed and joylessness (which I don’t take so seriously most of the time) was significant enough for God to send Christ to die for.

I happened to walk into the living room while the kids were watching a movie (set in South Africa) and although I had to immediately leave (can’t really handle realistic, tragic movies) I saw a dreadful scene of a murderous man screaming horrors to another. I felt for a second that I was going to be sick, which is an extraordinary reaction, even for me, but instead found myself in my room again, crying, realising that it was for people like this also, that Christ died.

I’m sure I don’t understand the extent of my/our sin if Christ was forsaken by his father for both me and these others who commit such violent atrocities…but somehow he dealt with it all. And in grace now, I stand, freed from any guilt.

I can only say, “Thankyou Father”.

From Colossians 2:6,7. So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness.